I know I should care, but I don’t

May 5, 2010 at 11:19 am (The Movie I'm not Seeing this Weekend) (, , , , )

So, Iron Man 2, right?

I mean, you couldn’t get a better Tony Stark than Robert Downey Jr. if you tried. (They probably tried, right?) He perfectly embodies the charming playboy with a slightly self-destructive streak who also likes to wear body armor and blow shit to smithereens that is Tony “Iron Man” Stark.

Iron Man! Iron Man! Does whatever! An Iron can!

And Mickey Rourke! He is awesomely terrifying, what with his Mickey Rourke-iness and his suit with the electricty whips.

I don't know how else to describe that quality he has. "Mickey Rourke-iness" is the best I can do. Shameful, really.

I mean, those are some cool things! And I’m a comic book geek, man! I should be wetting my pants for this!

But, like when Iron Man (1) opened, I’m not.

Maybe it's all the primary colors?

And I’m really sorry about that. I’ve tried to be enthusiastic. I’ve been like, “ooooh, but everybody loved the first one! It was supposed to be a great comic book adaptation! The second one should be just as good, because comic book movies don’t start sucking until the third installment (Fantastic Four being the notable exception, as it began sucking immediately).”

But then I realize, oh, right, I never got around to seeing the first one. ‘Cause I just didn’t care.

I’ve never cared about Iron Man. I’m sorry. Sure, he’s not as annoying as Spiderman, nor as omnipresent as Wolverine, but he’s just also been one of those Marvel heroes that’s sort of just there. I have nothing against Iron Man (not like the way I do that goody two-shoes Captain America), but I’m not really rooting for him either.

Errr, go, Iron Man. I'm sure the concrete deserves it.

So I guess what I’m saying here is I’m saving my money for Solomon Kane, unless that already came out and my town’s suckhole movie theater didn’t get it either.

He shoots people with two guns at once! How can I not love this movie???


1 Comment

  1. You know what doesn’t look funny? « Hollywood Hates Me said,

    […] lately, things have led me to conclude that I was […]

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