“I Love You OK”: a love letter to Eikichi Onizuka

September 24, 2010 at 3:05 pm (I Propose to Fictional Characters) (, )

Dear Eikichi Onizuka,

Recently, I re-read every volume of GTO, and I was reminded of how godsdamned awesome you are, and how much I love you.

And, now that I know you were played by this guy, I guess I need to sit down and watch the live-action television series too.

Really. I love you. I love your bleached blonde hair and your disrespect toward authority and the way you take beating after beating after beating, and fall after fall after fall from building tops and don’t die.

Your ability to take a licking and keep on ticking leads me to believe that you are at least part zombie.

I have to admit, I’m not so big on the panty-peeping, but in comparison to that teacher who was spying on girls in the toilet, you are a paragon of virtue. (I don’t even know what that means.)

According to Google, it's this.

But I think what I love the most about you, Eikichi Onizua, is the way you’re a teacher, but you never seem to actually teach anything. (OK, sure, you taught some great life lessons and your students all learned to enjoy school and etc., but it wasn’t like you had a lesson plan or anything. Or could spell lesson plan or anything.)

I also love this cover of GTO. It's muh favorite.

Ooooh, oooh, and also, you drive a motorcycle.

Also, doing a google search for "GTO" brings up tons of photos of classic cars, which doesn't hurt your case any.

So please marry me, Onizuka. We can live together on the rooftop of your school in bliss.

Or maybe we should get an apartment.

Definitely an apartment.

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