Red: some things need clearing up here

October 13, 2010 at 10:44 am (The Movie I'm not Seeing this Weekend) (, , , , , , , )

So I have some confusion about the new film Red. Like, is it supposed to be based on the comic book or not?

It was three issues of sheer mayhem. There was also some carnage. Well, quite a bit of carnage, actually.

Because I thought that it was because it’s called Red, like the comic book.

And because Bruce Willis looks EXACTLY like the main character. (Because he's bald. It's because he's bald.)

But then I thought, maybe that’s wrong because, apparently, RED stands for Retired, Extremely Dangerous?, but in the book, Red was just a code name.

And then I thought, well, maybe it is based on the comic book, because it’s about a retired hitman.

Ha, ha, you stupid poster, I think you meant "he has people to kill."

But then I thought, maybe not, because who are all these other retired hitmen? And hitwoman? Because there was only one assassin in the comic book (and his code name was Red.)

Well, yes, I know it's Morgan Freeman, John Malkovich and Helen Mirren, but what I meant was what are they doing in this movie?

Of course, the DC Comics logo is there, so that might indicate that it’s based on the comic book.

Except that it’s called an “action comedy,” and I don’t see what’s so funny about a new FBI director deciding to have a retired hitman killed and then that hitman kills, well, pretty much every other character in the comic book instead. I mean, if that’s the sort of thing that makes you laugh, then I really hope you don’t know where I live.

So maybe it is based on the comic book? Like really, really loosely based on the comic book? Like if they decided not to pay Warren Ellis any royalty money and called the thing Maroon, he wouldn’t really be able to sue them?


I don’t know. But Helen Mirren has a machine gun, so that’s pretty cool.

She still looks elegant, though.



  1. RubyRoses said,

    I don’t think these things will be cleared up. Just weird right? Nothing is like wrong with the cast, and the movie looks good. Oh! Maybe it’s really just ‘inspired by’, that makes a lot more sense…

    • lokifire said,

      Yeah! “Red, inspired by, but not actually based on, a comic book with the same name”!
      Brought to you by the color Red.

      • RubyRoses said,

        Just like the comic bumped into the movie. Probably not brought by red most likely Elmo.

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