Who names their kid Scut Farkus?

December 6, 2010 at 12:48 pm (Whatever happened to ...?) (, , , )

Welcome to a Christmas edition Whatever happened to…?, because I can’t guarantee I’ll remember to do Christmas-themed stuff closer to Christmas. It’s just so stressful and confusing.

So this is a post about whatever happened to the actor who played Scut Farkus in A Christmas Story, not so much because I never heard of him again after that, but because who the hell is he in the first place?

Yellow eyes and a coonskin hat? (That is coonskin on his head, right? I mean, what kind of animal is that?)

It turns out that the immortal Scut Farkus (“he had yellow eyes, so help me, yellow eyes“) was played by one Zack Ward, who was born in 1970 and has cemented a place as a Hollywood ginger, because that is what we call redheads now. (Unless I’m behind the times, like I usually am.) (Also, when did we start calling redheads gingers? And hating them? Why the redhead hate? I don’t understand.)

OK, well this ... is a bit terrifying.

According to his IMDB bio, Zach Ward grew up wanting to be an actor but his actor mom wouldn’t let him and finally his brother intervened and then she let him. It seems like there’s a more drama-filled story there, but this is IMDB, mind you, not a Lifetime movie. Anyway, his first — and breakthrough — role was in 1983’s A Christmas Story, as the bully who terrorizes Ralphie and his friends until Ralphie whoops him in only the way that a potential Type-A personality office worker can.

Ralphie later went on to kill his coworkers.

After that, I lost track of him because I never knew his name was Zach Ward, and also, he’s been in a bunch of stuff that I’ve never seen. Like he was in that show The Pretender in 1999, like my boy Dana Ashbrook, and I still don’t remember that show existing at all.

Hmmmmm ... nope. No bells ringing here.

But back to the ’80s, he went on to be featured in an Anne of Green Gables TV movie, because the redheaded Anne of Green Gables would of course have redheaded friends or whatever. He had roles in a few more TV movies after that, which your grandma probably saw because grandmothers watch those, and then guest roles on shows ranging in quality from Sliders to Jag (which is kind of like going from Point A to Point A). In 2000, he had a role in Almost Famous, but when Fairuza Balk gets credited before you, it’s kind of assumed it’s not a particularly … pivotal … role.

On the bright side, he looks quite good in a suit.

He then got a role on Fox’s Titus, which was a not-horrible comedy, and that’s what he was doing in the early 00s. (Remember: pronounced as “The Aughts.”) Then on to more guest roles and several voice roles in video games, like Kristen Bell, and even a part on Lost in 2005 as Marc Silverman, a character who must have shown up after I quit watching the show. That role on Lost opened a whole new world of sci-fi guest roles, and he’s since appeared in The Sarah Conner Chronicles, Dollhouse and Warehouse 13.

And in a series of scented candle ads?

One of his most recent roles is in something called In the Void as Mark, the synopsis of which mentions Barbara, Nick and Leonardo (but not Mark), and he’s in the not-yet-released sci-fi thriller/Brian Austin Green vehicle Last Stop, which also stars someone named Boots Sutherland who is a mystery even to IMDB.

A German web site thinks this is Boots Sutherland, but it's a German web site, so who knows.

Zack Ward is not this Zach Ward, who is a comedian and not a ginger.

Zack Ward is this Zack Ward, who apparently only eats, sleeps, acts and lifts weights because holy cow those arms.

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