Why did I really, really like X-Men: First Class?

September 11, 2011 at 1:50 pm (Randomosity) (, , , )

Since nobody took me up on my offer to go to X-Men: First Class on their dime, I ended up not seeing it until this weekend. And it was so good, squeeeeee, you know, you already saw it, but wow!

Look at all those mutants! Especially the one on our left. Mrow.

Like, my favorite things were Magneto and the way he totally kept superpowering people to death. Also Magneto and the way he climbed out of water in a black suit and was dripping wet. In addition, Magneto and the way he … did stuff. In conclusion, I want to have Michael Fassbender’s babies now, very much.

He has the superpower of I can't take my eyes off him.

Outside of my enduring love for Erik Lensherr and his superpower of being the best mutant ever, I also very much enjoyed Banshee, who was totally adorable and had such a deep voice for such a skinny kid, and Havok, who (if I remember correctly, and I don’t guarantee that I do) is totally Cyclops’s older brother!

Banshee, I would totally tousle your hair when my new boyfriend Young Magneto isn't looking.

I was not so much a fan of the ladies, but I figure Mystique needs some time to grow into her awesomeness and stop saying “Mutant and Proud,” because that is really annoying, thankyouverymuch. I’m not sure what could improve Moira MacTaggert or Angel, but Emma Frost was about what I expected, which is just fine.

You know, sexy, blonde, kind of ridiculous looking in crystal form.

But that doesn’t matter, because did I mention that scene where Magneto stabs the Nazi in the hand and then magnetics another Nazi to death, then stabs some other guy with the knife, then magnetics the knife out of him and stabs the Nazi in the hand again and then shoots that guy? Because I meant to mention that scene if I didn’t.

Although I do hate the codename "Magneto," because I'm always like, "But magnets can't do that!"

And also the scene where he rips that ship to shreds with the anchor?

I couldn't find any pictures of that scene, so please enjoy this image of Michael Fassbender and a glass of water. I know I will.

Also where he pulls the submarine out of the water?

While he's in an experimental jet?

Plus, thanks to X-Men: First Class, I finally know that Sebastian Shaw has the power of energy absorption, like that guy in Stormwatch. Except that guy was Russian and not Kevin Bacon.

I've never understood why his codename was Winter, though.

I also learned that Charles Xavier has been a prissy little bitch, but that I don’t mind it as much when it’s coming from Jean-Luc Picard.

I think it's the dignified manner that makes me more forgiving.

In conclusion, I totally will forgive this movie for killing off the guy whose superpower was “adapting to survive” as long as there is a second movie that will explain what happened to all these super-awesome mutants and also has more scenes of Michael Fassbender doing situps or something.

Or, um, anything really.

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14 Comments

  1. greg said,

    Yeah, Magneto was awesome. I kinda wished he didn’t turn into the bad guy at the end of the movie. Would’ve loved to see him and Xavier be buddies for a while longer.

    January Jones (who played Emma Frost) was terrible. If Keanu Reeves is a wooden actor, she’s a petrified wooden actress. Just horrible. Emma has so much more personality than Jones has Mad Men riches. (Okay, not a great zing, but I was trying to think of something for her, and that’s all I got.)

    And I didn’t like how all the black characters were killed or turned evil halfway through the movie. That’s just sad.

    But yeah, very good movie all around, which surprised me. After the last two X-films (X3 and Wolverine), I was expecting this to be boring at best. Good movie (even though the continuity here makes absolutely no sense with the other movies, but whatever).

    • lokifire said,

      I’ve never seen January Jones in anything else, so I totally assumed it was a conscious choice to play Emma Frost as affectless.
      And I’m sorry, but don’t you mean the black (singular) character? Everybody else was white or perhaps Latino.
      But it’s okay, because they’re mutants!!

      • greg said,

        Angel was played by the daughter of Lenny Kravitz and Lisa Bonet, so she’s black. But, meh…

        Honestly, I haven’t seen January Jones in anything else either, but whoever’s decision it was to make Emma affectless was stupid. I’ve heard rumors that she scares children on the set of Mad Men, and I can clearly see how that would be possible.

      • greg said,

        Oh geez, I’m surfing through IMDB, and the guy who played Darwin was also in Twilight. Did not want to know that. On the bright side, he was also on House for a while.

      • lokifire said,

        That’s why he looked so familiar! House!
        Also, Lisa Bonet and Lenny Kravitz had a kid? Who knew? (I mean, sure, you did, but who else???)

  2. Natalie said,

    My favorite part was when Magneto squished the Nazi soldiers heads inside their helmets. Why is Kevin Bacon always such a dick, though?

    • lokifire said,

      I think it’s because he looks like such a dick. Also, I loved how the helmet was totally obviously made for Michael Fassbender, so Kevin Bacon looked especially ridiculous in it.

      • Jamin said,

        Hmmm, that’s gonna make 6-Degrees of Kevin Bacon too easy. He looks like one, I have one, done!

        Off topic: not sure what i think of Morning Glories so far. I mean, it’s interesting, well written and nicely illustrated… but the fact that i only like one character (Hunter), and can tolerate two others (Casey and Jun), while i despise 3 others (Ike, Zoe, and Jade), makes me wonder how well it will hold my interest. Does it get better?

      • lokifire said,

        Er…. no, it doesn’t get any better.
        You don’t like Zoe? I think she’s so fun.
        And you only tolerate Jun? But he’s the best one!!!!!!

      • Jamin said,

        I despise shallow, mean people, and that’s Zoe in spades. As far as Jun goes, i can see myself liking him, but by the end of the 6th issue, they haven’t really done anything with him yet, except hint that he may have been replaced by a doppelganger. Yeah, he seems sorta cool, but he’s far too mysterious to be likable at this point.

      • lokifire said,

        Well, jeez, now I regret recommending it.

  3. Jamin said,

    Haha, don’t say that. It’s still interesting. I’m not going to give up on it just yet. I just hope some of the other characters grow on me a bit more 🙂

    • Jamin said,

      bahhh… this was meant to be a reply to your comment, not a whole new thread…

      • lokifire said,

        Yeah, that happens. I think you’ll get to like the characters more in the second story arc … but maybe not.

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