My shameful past: A history of celebrity crushes

October 31, 2013 at 10:31 am (Top Ten) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , )

We all know I currently have the good taste to obsess over Sherlock Holmes himself, Mr. Benedict Cumberbatch. But the truth is: I haven’t always had good taste. Some of my celebrity crushes are … a bit embarrassing in retrospect. But because my humiliation is your entertainment, here’s a list of celebrities I used to adore!

But before we get into that, let's all enjoy this photo of Benedict Cumberbatch!

Before we get into that, though, let’s all enjoy this photo of Benedict Cumberbatch!

1. Thriller-era Michael Jackson. I’m specifying the era here because at this point, his skin was still kind of dark, his nose hadn’t completely come off and there were no creepy child molestation allegations popping up yet.

I got over it by the second grade, though.

I got over it by the second grade, though.

2.Rick Astley. It’s true. I was Rickrolled. (Is that even a thing anymore?)

Sexy nerd glasses alert!

Sexy nerd glasses alert!

3. Joey from the New Kids on the Block. Happily, I got over it, and did not attend any of their reunion concerts.

Although if this current picture is any proof, I definitely picked the best New Kid on the Block.

At least it looks like I picked the New Kid on the Block who would age the best.

4. Balthazar Getty. He was soooo cute in Young Guns 2!

Such a bad boy!

Such a bad boy!

5. Emilio Estevez. He was soooo cute in Young Guns 2!

I, ah, really liked Young Guns 2.

I, ah, really liked Young Guns 2.

6. Stephen Baldwin. I think. Anyway, whichever Baldwin brother was in that short-lived TV show about the Pony Express.

Oh, yup. Stephen.

Oh, yup. Stephen.

7. Christian Slater. It was so bad, I even watched that terrible skateboarding movie he was in.

The good news is that I also watched Heathers.

The good news is that I also watched Heathers.

8.Kiefer Sutherland. This one isn’t that embarrassing, because Mr. Sutherland is still pretty awesome, though not as awesome as his dad.

It was the Lost Boys that did it.

It was the Lost Boys that did it. Although he was also in Young Guns 2.

But Donald is such an enduring example of utter silver fox. Mrow.

But Donald is such an enduring example of utter silver fox. Mrow.

9. Remington Steele. Er, I mean, Pierce Brosnan?

Wait, both those names are ridiculous.

Wait, both those names are ridiculous.

10. Nelson. I loved them for their long blonde hair, I guess.

Or possibly their fabulous sense of style.

Or possibly their fabulous sense of style.

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