Right. So, the first thing about this new Tarzan movie is that I’ve been reading about feral children lately, and most of them can’t speak. So every time I see an ad for this new Tarzan flick and he’s speaking perfect English, I’m like: “Pfft! Like he’d be able to talk at all!”
The second thing about the new Tarzan flick is boy do those apes look fake.
The third thing is does Samuel L. Jackson have to take every role he’s offered? Is it some sort of “deal with the devil” scenario?
The last thing is there’s only one true Tarzan, and that Tarzan is Johnny Weissmuller.