R. Dorothy Wayneright vs. Robin

October 20, 2016 at 10:12 am (Fictional Character Battles) (, , , , , , )

In one corner, we have the best lady android ever, R. Dorothy Wayneright. She is the sidekick of the Japanese Batman, who wears nice suits and pilots a giant robot, making him even more awesome than regular Batman.

You guys, giant robots are SO AWESOME.

You guys, giant robots are SO AWESOME.

In the other corner, we have Robin, who is the sidekick of regular Batman, who is actually pretty awesome, even if he doesn’t pilot a giant robot.

Despite this image, Batman is still awesome.

Despite this image, Batman is still awesome.

Who shall win? Let’s find out, why not.

Physicality. Robin is an athletic teenage boy or young man in his early 20s, depending on your source. I mean, sure, who doesn’t like athletic young men, amiright? R. Dorothy Wayneright is a robot designed to look like a young woman with a really cute pageboy. Winner? I’m a sucker for girls with cute pageboys. R. Dorothy Wayneright.

I wish my hair looked cute in a pageboy.

I wish my hair looked cute in a pageboy.

Is a fighting machine? Robin has been trained to be a fighting machine by Batman, the fightiest of all the fighting superheroes. On the other hand, R. Dorothy Wayneright is actually a machine. Winner? R. Dorothy Wayneright.

Also: She'll cut you. She'll cut you good.

Also: She’ll cut you. She’ll cut you good.

Lives in a post-apocalyptic world, or possibly a Matrix-esque simulation? Robin lives in, like, our world, except physics is insane there, which must be nice, because people can fly and whatever. R. Dorothy Wayneright lives in Paradigm City, where everybody lost their memories 40 years ago, after some sort of apocalyptic scenario, or else everything is just a Matrix-esque simulation and life is only a fleeting dream. Winner? R. Dorothy Wayneright.

Sadly, nobody has superpowers. Happily, there are giant robots.

Sadly, nobody has superpowers. Happily, there are giant robots.

Has a better code name? Dick Grayson’s code name is Robin, which is a pretty, pretty bird. R. Dorothy Wayneright’s code name is R. Dorothy Wayneright, because awesome lady androids don’t need code names, that why. Winner? R. Dorothy Wayneright.

You look into her cold dead eyes and tell her she needs a code name, why not.

You look into her cold dead eyes and tell her she needs a code name, why not.

This battle is seeming pretty lopsided. Yeah, I’m rewatching The Big O, and I remembered how much I love R. Dorothy Wayneright, and I never have liked Robin, but I haven’t had any good blog ideas lately, so I thought, hey! Why not?

I really enjoy noir-ish anime featuring giant robots, Japanese Batman and the best lady android ever.

I really enjoy noir-ish anime featuring giant robots, Japanese Batman and the best lady android ever.

So should we just call it then? Yes. Yes, we should.

Overall winner? R. Dorothy Wayneright, the best lady android ever!

I'm still sorry about that, Caprica Six.

I’m still sorry about that, Caprica Six.

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6 Comments

  1. brikhaus said,

    Not a fair comparison. You should have done Dorothy vs. Data.

    • lokifire said,

      Psssh. Data doesn’t hang out with Outer Space Batman, whatchoo even talking ’bout, Willis????

      • brikhaus said,

        OK, NOW DO PICARD VS KIRK VS ASH VS FREDDY!

      • lokifire said,

        OF COURSE ASH WOULD WIN BECAUSE BRUCE CAMPBELL IS A GOD!
        (But thanks for the idea. I’m not enough of a Trekker to have considering Capt. Kirk vs. Capt. Picard until you said it just now.)

      • brikhaus said,

        “The only question I ever thought was hard, was do I like Kirk or do I like Picard?” – Weird Al (I think)

      • Jamin said,

        The correct answer is Sisko. But answering Picard is also acceptable.

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